We are living in an emotional and spiritual pandemic. A pandemic of resentment. Resentment is a psychic virus that can disable minds and hearts, and wreak havoc on public health. The genesis of the virus predates the book of Genesis, but it is in the first book of the Bible where it is first described. Cain kills his brother Abel out of resentment over God favoring Abel’s offering and ignoring his. Later on in the same book Jacob steals the birthright of his “older” twin brother Esau, which sets in motion a long narrative of resentment that is the source of the extended family’s dysfunction.
Resentment is not a new malady — it has been around for as long as we have been engaging with one another. But for me, and for so many of us, it seems that we are being subject to a variant of the resentment virus that is as disorienting as it is disabling. While not the source of this new variant, Donald Trump is a master at spreading it; and rendering it to be highly contagious. President Trump doesn’t govern by resentment; he rules by it.
His resentment extends to illegal aliens, to countries that he has decided have not engaged in fair trade, to the European Union who in his mind don’t pay their fair share, to trans people, to those who he deems to be “woke”, to institutions that have anything to do with DEI, to Democrats, to anyone and everyone who challenges him on his facts or his racist curation of American history. The virus keeps spreading because his list of resentments expands daily, if not hourly.
And we are highly susceptible in catching the virus — either by cheering it on or being emotionally flattened by it. Many of us end up giving resentment enormous space in our psyches or providing it with long term leases in our minds. The resentment may not impel us to follow Cain’s example to kill our siblings, (although we have seen that happen all too often through the centuries) but it can generate enough indignation that we kill off ideas or perspectives., and readily dismiss who categories of people. As for stealing, our resentment can cause us to rob people of their dignity and their intrinsic value.
There is not a vaccine for the virus of resentment, but there is practice that can keep it at bay. It is the practice of gratitude, which is rooted in joy. It is a real discipline. It involves a choice. It requires choosing for the light even when there is much darkness to frighten, much resentment to overcome, choosing for gratitude and joy even when the forces of death are so visible, and choosing for truth even when we are surrounded by lies.
Joy can come out of pain, but it cannot come out of resentment. As Henri Nouwen, a spiritual mentor for me and thousands of others, put it —“joy never denies the sadness (and resentment), but transforms it to a fertile soil for more joy.”
The virus of resentment is spreading. It is highly toxic and contagious. Gratitude and joy are remedies at our disposal, gifts that we can and need to claim. Gratitude and joy are readily available, but not easy to use. There is an urgent need these days for us to choose to use them. We need a community of support to help us — and what is gratifying is that there are initiatives of hope that are sprouting up all over the place: Braver Angels, One America, Listen First, Resetting the Table are among the growing number of national movements and organizations. There are scores of local engagements involving citizens who are committed to building relationships across difference, which serve as antidotes to resentment. While not vaccines that we jab into our arms, they are gatherings and actions that quicken the spirit, heal the soul, and serve as incubators of gratitude and joy. The reward of choosing joy is joy itself. It is a gift, yes, but is also a kind of weapon that has the capacity to thwart the spread of the resentment virus.
I invite us to make the effort and choose the gifts of gratitude and joy. Our country needs them.
