I have recently engaged my mind in a paradox that both strengthens my resolve and soothes my soul. Love more. Resist more. Normally it is thought that loving and resisting need to be kept separate from one another: you can’t love someone or something you are resisting; and you can’t resist someone or something you are loving. Resisting while loving seems limp, flaccid, ineffective. Loving while resisting seems soupy, naive, if not moronic. But if the desire to love and the intention to resist are brought together, and brought together carefully, a synergy can happen and an energy can be released.
Like many of us, I am disturbed, if not disgusted with the words and actions of President Trump and his administration. I feel an intense desire and commitment to resist the ongoing hurricane of attempts to disable democracy, malign and mistreat immigrants, normalize corruption and the daily barrage of verbal and physical cruelty. I am clear in that desire to resist, but rather unclear how to engage in a resistance that would be effective and sustainable, and at the same time untie the knot in my stomach and provide me with more uninterrupted sleep.
It is tempting to focus my disgust at the president. That would be relatively easy, given that there are so many sources of disgust that I could read, listen to, and watch that would support me. But the invitation — indeed the challenge — that is coming to me is to love the man. At some level most of us can blithely say that we love everyone, because they are part of the human family, and are Imago Dei, Latin for created in the image of God. But that is a conceptual love, which doesn’t require much more than a verbal assent. It can end up being a dodge. Love more is different. It requires a movement of the heart to fully embrace the other in love; which means to offer a full blessing on the soul of the other.
A full blessing doesn’t mean acceptance. It doesn’t mean agreement. It doesn’t mean that we need to like the other or what he or she is doing. It turns out that loving more is a pathway to freedom, because as we give our heart of love to another, even someone we are not inclined to offer that love to, we are becoming unhooked from all the nastiness coming from the other. And the less likely we will be to return the nastiness. It is work, and we need to keep at it, over and over again. Even when we don’t want to. We need to work to love more.
And the paradox is that the more we love, the more psychic space we have to resist. And we become more able to resist more — more effectively and with greater clarity and persistence. Because the resistance becomes more focused on the issue rather than on the person who is promoting and provoking the injustice. At the same time the resistance can include – and should include – an intent to love more those who are being targeted, mistreated, or denounced by the animosity from Trump and his allies.Those in the crosshairs need our love.
As I contemplate how best to love and resist, I often look to the legacy of Jesus, Martin Luther King Jr. and Desmond Tutu. They loved fiercely.They resisted valiantly.They were remarkably effective, in that they have inspired millions to carry on their witness. In different ways, Jesus, Dr. King and Bishop Tutu brought love and resistance together.There are many other examples — in history and in the unique sphere of our own lives. Looking to and learning from their example will provide support and guidance for the loving more and resisting more that these days call for.
